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Oh yes I did the Knowledge,
to earn an honest bob,
Now it seems that TFL are trying to kill my job,
Cos my job means the world to me,
And I think you’ll all agree,
That’s why I went to tell Hendy,
When I demo’d Windsor

Would there ever be a breakthrough,
It felt to me like deja vu,
Til Emmerson got touted too,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

In my profession I work hard,
at times I never stop,
Iconic the world over,
Now our rival’s Uber Pop!

Cos my job means the world to me,
And I think you’ll all agree,
That’s why I went to tell Hendy,
When I demo’d Windsor

SatNav dependant that ain’t right,
Causing problems day and night,
Yet they keep licensing this shite,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

Boris does he really care,
He’s just a tit with stupid hair,
Wish TFL would grow a pair,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

In my profession I work hard,
at times I never stop,
Iconic the world over,
Now our rival’s Uber Pop!

I can’t believe the way it’s gone,
But we know who to blame it on
Peter, Garrett and Leon,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

In my profession I work hard,
at times I never stop,
Iconic the world over,
Now our rival’s Uber Pop!

I can’t believe the way it’s gone,
But we know who to blame it on
Peter, Garrett and Leon,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

Bald head, Knighthood and big gob,
Who I can’t control his Thirty Bob,
But somehow gets to keep his job,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

We have to fight them all the way,
Stand together now I say,
Can’t let em take our jobs away,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

To earn our badges we worked hard,
We never missed a trick,
We’re Taxi and the arsehole is a bloke called Kalanick

A company that don’t pay tax
A governing body that’s so lax,
We turned around and they stabbed our backs,
That’s why I demo’d Windsor

If we’re strong we’ll get em banned,
When the Unions link up hands,
Come together, make a stand,
Next time we demo Windsor!

Put the SatNav on my dash,
Make it tight so it don’t fall,
Check that everything is right,
So I don’t drive into a wall!

I wait on side streets for a ride,
Til the early morning light.
It might surge to double time,
And help me make it through the night,

Don’t care if I am driving wrong,
Cos English I don’t understand,
I’ll work right through until tomorrow,
Cos I’m supposed to clear a Grand!

Yesterday I made a Ton
For 20 hours that’s not right,
May need more caffeine in a while,
To help me make it through the night..

Don’t care if I am driving wrong,
Cos road signs I don’t understand,
I’ll work right through until tomorrow
Cos they promised me a Grand

Yesterday I made a Ton,
End up with 30 and that’s not right,
Just made my coffee double strong,
To help me make it through the night,

Help me make it through the night,
Help me make it through the night…

I got a SatNav, GPS, crumpled suit and mobile,
No CRB and driving on my second cousins ID,
Never heard of Highway Code,
What d’ya mean a one way road?
Have you got a post code,
Cos I’ve never heard of Shepherds Bush,
Bush Bush Bush Bush Bush Bush Bush,

No Income Tax, no VAT,
No insurance, no MOT,
I’m Uber X, I’m Hailo E,
I’m London’s finest PHV,
God bless PHV, London’s PHV,
Thank you Pete Hendy,
I’ll have your daughter in my PHV
Touting up London in my PHV,

Who do you think you are kidding Boris Johnson!

Who do you think you are kidding Boris Johnson,
If you think the cab trade,
We are the boys & girls who’ll stop your little game,
We are the ones who will make think again,
So who do you think you are kidding Boris Johnson,
If you think the cab trade’s done,

Hendy, Daniels, Emmerson all perched upon your knee,
You think you’re high and mighty,
but we’re here to fell your tree,

We have to be united now and do it without fuss,
And when we get the upper hand we’ll kick em all off their bus,
Oh, who do you think you’re kidding Boris Johnson,
If you think the cab trade’s done…